the migrant wife

When our son was very little, a friend gave us a CD of Steve Green’s Hide ‘Em In Your Heart series. These are boppy tunes composed to help little ones remember God’s word and hide them in their hearts. Steve’s tunes can be heard in our household on the daily – in the car, while playing, mealtimes… which also has an added benefit: I can hide them in my heart too! 

I was surprised how much of God’s word applies to mothering. There are no distinctions between children or adult memory verses, because:

All Scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness, so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work. (2 Timothy 3:16-17)

Here are a few ways Steve’s songs encourages mothers:

1. Keep your tongue from evil and your lips from speaking lies. (Psalm 34:13 NHEB) 

Frustrations are a routine part of mothering on this side of Eden. It takes active effort not to lash out with your words, or mutter unkind things under your breath. It takes discipline – but is so worth it. There have been times where I felt my internal stress rising, and this song came to mind, no doubt by the Holy Spirit’s prompting. Keeping your tongue doesn’t feel good in the moment, but you know what does? Experiencing a frustrating moment, keeping your tongue, and then realising that you had overcome with God’s help!

2. “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? 26 Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Can any one of you by worrying add a single hour to your life?…Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. (Matthew 6:25-27, 34)

Do any mothers not worry? What will my child wear? How will my child develop? Are they getting the right nutrients? It strikes me that God must have so many tabs open just to keep track of those things for us. But knowing that He keeps track helps me – I’m not the ultimate provider here. Worrying is silly (easier said than done). This tune acts more like a ‘get a grip, Charlie’ when my thoughts start to spiral. 

3. Honour your father and your mother, as the LORD your God has commanded you, that your days may be long, and that it may be well with you in the land which the LORD your God is giving you. (Deuteronomy 5:16)

This one is not only a reminder to our children to honour us. As adult children, we also have responsibility to our own parents / elders. Our child should not be the centre of our family lives – this is too much pressure to put on any one individual. Our commitments to parents / elders might change, but the principle still stands: Honour your father and mother. It might take creativity, consistency, clarity, and confidence. I am still learning this, Lord help me!

4. Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, “children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.” Then you will shine among them like stars in the sky (Philippians 2:14-15)

Bitterness is the poisonous fruit that comes from an ungrateful heart, and its symptoms are laid out here: grumbling and arguing. I want things my way. I want to optimise circumstances for myself. I want what is best for me. But similar to keeping the tongue (see point 1), doing everything without grumbling or arguing takes discipline.

It’s almost harder not to do something than to do something. That’s why we don’t muster it up from within ourselves – the motivation is there in the verse! We do it because we are children of God, bought at a high price, and from that identity we can live out blameless and pure lives as a testament to His holiness. 

5. But Jesus said, “Let the little children come to Me, and do not forbid them; for of such is the kingdom of heaven.” (Matthew 19:14)

The encouragement in this is twofold. First, our children are so welcome to Christ and to learn at His feet. Even at a young age, they are given senses and faculties to understand basic matters of life and relationship: they can draw near and learn. What opportunity we have to teach them of Christ’s kingdom!

Secondly, most of the time we are too busy to be child-like. We are encumbered by many things, the more sophisticated things, that childish play and repetition are left at the wayside. We can come to Christ, simply. It is almost too simple to be enough, but that’s the gospel: He only requires a child-like reception of a gift so lavishly, graciously given. 

6. Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths (Proverbs 3:5-6)

Trusting is a mind-boggling exercise. The verse tells us to do the trusting and the acknowledging, and God can do the directing. But every fibre of our flesh wants to do the directing ourselves, and God to merely do the acknowledging.

I find it exceptionally difficult to trust in the Lord when it comes to busy-ness. When my to-do list grows a mile long, and arms and legs, I find it difficult to prioritise trusting the Lord and spend time with him. I hoard time – I cram everything into the precious few pockets of time, forgetting that the Lord honours those who honour Him and I can spend the first fruits of my time with Him. I sing this song in my head to remember it is ‘in all your ways’ and not ‘in the convenient ways’. And He will direct my paths, as He has proven time and time again. 

7. Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light to my path. (Psalm 119:105)

Similar to the previous one: we need God’s word. I have heard podcasts where mothers have said, in [insert busy season] don’t feel too bad about not reading the Bible or not having any Bible input in your life. I can’t help but think, that is the worst advice you can give! God’s Word is profitable in all seasons, and we certainly need to hear His voice more in needy seasons, not less. 

8. A joyful heart is good medicine, but a broken spirit dries up the bones. (Proverbs 17:22)

A wise lady once told me: Mothers are the thermostat of the home. Mothers set the tone. I have realised the difference it makes when I employ a cheerful attitude as I go about my duties around the house! Even on days where I find it difficult to smile, asking the Lord for joy that comes from Him makes my heart a slight bit lighter. 

Some other ones that aren’t Steve Green:

1. Be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to anger (James 1:19)

I have touched on keeping the tongue earlier with Steve Green’s song. It is often easier to follow a ‘positive’ instruction (i.e. do something, rather than not do something). This verse helps me when I am tempted to say a brash word, or assert myself before listening to everything the other has to say. Often much anger can be avoided if only I listened properly… 

2. Godliness with contentment is great gain. (1 Timothy 6:6)

‘Thank you’ is often one of the first words mothers teach their children to say, after being given food, or toys, or being helped. Saying thank-you is easy, but being thankful is often far from our minds as we go about our days! Contentment is more than being grateful: it is a state of happiness and satisfaction, often about one’s circumstances or experiences.

Being content as a mother looks like: looking around and thanking God for all He has provided. Being sure of our identity in Christ, that we no longer have to strive aimlessly. Sitting down and taking in everything that the day has held, giving it all to Him, the good and the disappointing. It is something that is learnt, as even the Apostle Paul has testified (Philippians 4:11-13)

3. For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give His life as a ransom for many. (Mark 10:45)

(What a boppy tune!) I was wary of writing a piece like this because it can very easily turn into legalistic rules – do this, don’t do that, because God said so, and listen to these memory verses! Yet all of this is underpinned by a settled knowledge of my glorious status being hidden in Christ. He came to serve and to give His life as a ransom for many. I don’t have to earn that because I have been bestowed with the favour that He has earned on my behalf. That is a sure motivation for godly living!

And that’s it! I was surprised how much I have been blessed by these short reminders of God’s word, living in my heart. I think we should all take Steve’s advice and hide them in your heart!